Is Winter Still Coming?

After waiting several years for G.R.R. Martin to finish his books, I am not seeing it. I have no idea what is going on in the story other than it being a tangled mess of loose ends that are likely not related to the story. In typical Martin fashion, he may just kill off some more leading characters to make the plot simpler.

1. Aria dies of the measles. A simple vaccination could have saved her but her parents were isolationist Northerners. Suddenly everything she did leading up to this point becomes a total waste of ink.

2. Weren’t there some direwolves in this story somewhere? A pack of 5 puppies who were psychicly linked? Whatever happened to that?

3. The entire surviving mass of humanity in Westeros is unfit to survive, having depleted their stores in a long pointless was of succession when a cup of poison would have easily got the job done. When the White Walkers come down from the north, they will be bored with what they find remaining.

4. Crippled Stark kid dies of frostbite. He wasn’t old enough to remember just how cold Winter really is.

5. Sansa Stark marries Little Finger and lives happily ever after. Little Finger trips and falls down a long flight of stairs shortly after the marriage and before he can consummate it.

6. Entire Eastern world remembers why they exterminated the dragons the first time and do it again. Dragon girl gets a clue and discovers that she is already a queen right where she is and has no need to conquer a far away land to regain a throne in an ice-encrusted ice-zombie controlled island.

7. The dwarf supports himself by ambushing assassins who come to kill him and selling their stuff. But he never again has sex with a full sized woman because that fad has passed. Then as the sole surviving heir to Castorly rock (everyone else having froze to death) he is called home. He sends a raven with these words, “No thank you”. Before it can deliver the message, The raven gets lost and goes on a long journy of self discovery and multiple narrow escapes before it dies and is eaten by a hawk, adding another pointless plot twist to the already pointless story.

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About No One

I am totally non-threatening
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One Response to Is Winter Still Coming?

  1. heresolong says:

    Hahahahahahahahaha! Excellent.

    Like

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